{"id":201516,"date":"2023-03-16T17:53:53","date_gmt":"2023-03-16T17:53:53","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/?p=201516"},"modified":"2023-03-16T17:53:53","modified_gmt":"2023-03-16T17:53:53","slug":"i-am-working-on-myself-the-best-thing-a-divorced-person-can-say","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/i-am-working-on-myself-the-best-thing-a-divorced-person-can-say\/","title":{"rendered":"I Am Working On Myself: The Best Thing a Divorced Person Can Say!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p> <br \/>\n<\/p>\n<p>I seriously want to hug the woman who sent me the e-mail below! Like almost every <a href=\"https:\/\/www.cbgoodlaw.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener\">newly separated person,<\/a> she is fearful of the unknown, sad, in a way, and lonely. But, she ends her e-mail with, \u201cI am working on myself.&#8221; Wow. This is the best thing she can say and do right now. Here is her e-mail:<\/p>\n<p><em>Jackie,<\/em><em><br \/>\nNewly separated about 10 weeks I left our home of 25 plus years. feel<br \/>\n<a title=\"Anxiety and Panic Attacks after a Breakup or Divorce\" href=\"https:\/\/www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com\/anxiety-and-panic-attacks-after-a-breakup-or-divorce\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">really panicked at times<\/a> to go home. Was married 30 yrs. I am living with<br \/>\nmy mother and it a big house I&#8217;m ok with it, I just need to get some of my<br \/>\nfurniture, bed, and I am working on it.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em><br \/>\nMy feelings are over the top with all the unknown. how will it all turn<br \/>\nout in court? Am I doing everything right, am I going to be taken<br \/>\nadvantage of. it&#8217;s so many emotions.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em><br \/>\nI am involved with much volunteer work at my church. it helps a lot.<br \/>\n<a title=\"Surviving Loneliness After Divorce: It\u2019s Up to You\" href=\"https:\/\/www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com\/surviving-loneliness-after-divorce-its-up-to-you\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">I am lonely<\/a> for male companionship and am concerned that I will ever meet<br \/>\nsomeone where I am located.\u00a0 I am not into dating sites or anything like<br \/>\nthat. <\/em><em>I am working on myself. Any suggestions?<\/em><\/p>\n<h2>My reply: Do you realize the power of \u201cI am working on myself?\u201d<\/h2>\n<p>You are so ahead of the game! Some newly separated men and women either <a title=\"How to Recover from Divorce: Stop Playing the Victim!\" href=\"https:\/\/www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com\/how-to-get-over-a-divorce-stop-playing-the-victim\/\">go into victim mode<\/a> and blame everyone else for their problems, or rush into another relationship to try to put a Band-Aid and fix everything with romance and sex. I&#8217;m not judging, by the way, I did both <a href=\"https:\/\/katzstefani.com\/our-attorneys\/daniel-r-stefani\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener\">when I was getting divorced.<\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><a id=\"ad-article-hughes-5\" class=\"ad-article adclick\" href=\"https:\/\/thugheslaw.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full lazy\" width=\"245\" height=\"245\" src=\"https:\/\/dgs-1def7.kxcdn.com\/wp-content\/themes\/divorce-girl-smiling\/images\/tiffany-hughes-cta.jpg\" alt=\"Tiffany Hughes Law\" style=\"max-width: 245px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/www.podbean.com\/player-v2\/?from=embed&amp;i=n6aiu-126dee4-pb&amp;square=1&amp;share=1&amp;download=1&amp;fonts=Arial&amp;skin=1&amp;font-color=auto&amp;rtl=0&amp;logo_link=episode_page&amp;btn-skin=7&amp;size=300\" width=\"100%\" height=\"300\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>So, GOOD FOR YOU for being so insightful and strong! I would love to hear what you are doing for yourself, besides volunteering at your church (which I admire tremendously!!) My suggestions for \u201cworking on myself\u201d include things like <a title=\"Rita Morris, LMHC, M.A., Certified Life Coach and Parenting Coach, AParentsPath.com\" href=\"https:\/\/www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com\/rita-morris-lmhc-m-a-certified-life-coach-and-parenting-coach-aparentspath-com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">focusing and enjoying your kids <\/a>(if you have them), <a title=\"Divorce and Yoga: A Perfect Marriage!\" href=\"https:\/\/www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com\/20-benefits-of-yoga-during-divorce\/\">yoga, <\/a><a href=\"https:\/\/www.affiliatesincounseling.net\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener\">therapy,<\/a> faith, exercise, leaning on good friends and family, and taking life day by day.<\/p>\n<h2>A couple more things&#8230;<\/h2>\n<h2><strong>Living with your mom<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>I have no idea what your relationship is like with your mother, but I hope it\u2019s a good one! Enjoy her and take advantage of it. I\u2019m sure you won\u2019t be there for long, so treasure this time with her. If your relationship is strong, you need her now. That to me is beautiful, because that&#8217;s what moms and daughters are supposed to do-be there for each other.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><a id=\"ad-article-herzog\" class=\"ad-article adclick\" href=\"https:\/\/www.graceuntethered.com\/programs\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full lazy\" width=\"275\" height=\"275\" src=\"https:\/\/dgs-1def7.kxcdn.com\/wp-content\/themes\/divorce-girl-smiling\/images\/holly-herzog.jpg\" alt=\"Grace Untethered - Holly Herzog\" style=\"max-width: 275px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<h2><strong>The unknowns<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>Yes, these are very hard to deal with. Being in unfamiliar territory <a title=\"Litigation: A Divorce Process That is Not For Wimps\" href=\"https:\/\/www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com\/19-tips-for-those-facing-a-high-conflict-divorce\/\">(the divorce process)<\/a> is scary. It\u2019s a lot of ups and downs and unexpected things (both bad and good.) Try to look at it as a journey, and try to make sound, ethical, UNEMOTIONAL decisions. If you make decisions based on logic instead of <a title=\"How to Deal With Anger and Rage During Divorce\" href=\"https:\/\/www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com\/how-to-deal-with-anger-and-rage-during-divorce\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">anger or bitterness,<\/a> you will spend less money on your attorneys and be a happier person, in general.<\/p>\n<h2><strong>I\u2019m not into dating sites<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>My suggestion is, try dipping your toe in the water of dating sites and\/or apps. What I\u2019m saying is, no need to go crazy and put pressure on yourself to go on 5 dates a week. Start with one. Drive your own car, do not tell the guy where you live, don\u2019t have more than one cocktail (if you go to a bar or restaurant) and see what happens. If you hate it, don\u2019t do it again for a couple months and then try again.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><a id=\"ad-article-recovery\" class=\"ad-article adclick\" href=\"http:\/\/affiliatesincounseling.net\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener nofollow\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/dgs-1def7.kxcdn.com\/wp-content\/themes\/divorce-girl-smiling\/images\/divorce-recovery-12-2018.jpg\" width=\"280\" height=\"280\" alt=\"The Center for Divorce Recovery\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Also, it sounds like you live in a small town and I just want to tell you that <a title=\"8 Places to Meet Single Men and Women in the Suburbs: None are Bars!\" href=\"https:\/\/www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com\/8-places-meet-single-men-women-suburbs-none-bars\/\">there are single people EVERYWHERE.<\/a> Divorce doesn\u2019t only happen in New York City or LA or Chicago.<\/p>\n<p>Another great way to meet people is to make new friends. <a title=\"An Honest Look at opposite-sex friendships: 6 Things To Think About\" href=\"https:\/\/www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com\/an-honest-look-at-opposite-sex-friendships-6-things-to-think-about\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Platonic friends. <\/a>Ask your friends if they know any single people and just go out as friends. I love my guy friends, just as I love my girlfriends.<\/p>\n<p>Just be upfront and make sure the guys know it\u2019s platonic (if that\u2019s all you want.) What could end up happening is you could fall into a group of single people and have plans whenever you want. It\u2019s really nice to have that. Plus, you never know who they might know which could lead to a romantic relationship for you.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>You sound great! Just keep working on yourself. We should all be doing that, all the time. Not just during a divorce!<\/p>\n<p>A big part of the hardest part is over for you: your unhappy marriage. You are on your way to a happier, better place!<\/p>\n<h2>Like this article? Check out, <a title=\"20 Things I Wish I Could Have Told My Newly Separated Self\" href=\"https:\/\/www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com\/20-things-wish-told-newly-separated-self\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">&#8220;20 Things I Wish I Could Have Told My Newly Separated Self&#8221;<\/a><\/h2>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><a id=\"ad-article-novel1\" class=\"ad-article adclick\" href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Jackie-Pilossoph\/e\/B003G6VW2U?&amp;_encoding=UTF8&amp;tag=dgs07-20&amp;linkCode=ur2&amp;linkId=6644a12100b57267d80837a6316335d5&amp;camp=1789&amp;creative=9325\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer sponsored\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/dgs-1def7.kxcdn.com\/wp-content\/themes\/divorce-girl-smiling\/images\/dgs-novel-promo-2022.jpg\" width=\"275\" height=\"275\" alt=\"Buy novels by Jackie Pilossoph\" style=\"max-width:275px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><a id=\"ad-article-brown\" class=\"ad-article adclick\" href=\"https:\/\/www.jenniferbbrown.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full lazy\" width=\"275\" height=\"275\" src=\"https:\/\/dgs-1def7.kxcdn.com\/wp-content\/themes\/divorce-girl-smiling\/images\/cta-jenniferbrown.jpg\" alt=\"Jennifer B. Brown, Mortgage Lender, CDLP, Neighborhood Mortgage\" style=\"max-width: 275px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>The post <a rel=\"nofollow\" href=\"https:\/\/www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com\/i-am-working-on-myself-the-best-thing-a-divorced-person-can-say\/\">I Am Working On Myself: The Best Thing a Divorced Person Can Say!<\/a> appeared first on <a rel=\"nofollow\" href=\"https:\/\/www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com\">Divorce Blog | Divorce Support Blogs<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p><br \/>\n<br \/><a href=\"https:\/\/www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com\/i-am-working-on-myself-the-best-thing-a-divorced-person-can-say\/\">Source link <\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/contact-us\/\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/footer-300x100.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"600\" height=\"200\" class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-14\" srcset=\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/footer-300x100.png 300w, https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/footer-150x50.png 150w, https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/footer.png 600w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 600px) 100vw, 600px\" \/><\/a><br \/>\n<center><iframe loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/www.google.com\/maps\/embed?pb=!1m18!1m12!1m3!1d2476.5079014266626!2d-0.17814168422544607!3d51.6322229796558!2m3!1f0!2f0!3f0!3m2!1i1024!2i768!4f13.1!3m3!1m2!1s0x0%3A0xa69992b831f15d4a!2sDominic+Levent+Solicitors!5e0!3m2!1sen!2suk!4v1529480690358\" width=\"600\" height=\"450\" frameborder=\"0\" style=\"border:0\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe><\/center><br \/>\n<center><iframe loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/calendar.google.com\/calendar\/embed?src=sc635csnrm8h9s9lq0cad6vkss@group.calendar.google.com\" style=\"border:0px #ffffff none;\" name=\"myiFrame\" scrolling=\"no\" frameborder=\"1\" marginheight=\"0px\" marginwidth=\"0px\" height=\"3px\" width=\"600px\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe><\/center><br \/>\n<center><\/p>\n<div itemscope itemtype=\"http:\/\/schema.org\/LocalBusiness\">\n<div itemprop=\"image\" itemscope itemtype=\"http:\/\/schema.org\/ImageObject\">\n<img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.dominiclevent.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/06\/Business_Solicitors_London.jpg\" width=\"600\" itemprop=\"url\"><\/div>\n<p><\/br><\/p>\n<div itemprop=\"name\">Dominic Levent Solicitors<\/div>\n<div>Email: <span itemprop=\"email\">Enquiries@dominiclevent.com<\/span><\/div>\n<div>Phone: <span itemprop=\"telephone\">020 8347 6640<\/span><\/div>\n<div>Url: <span itemprop=\"url\">https:\/\/www.dominiclevent.com<\/span><\/div>\n<div itemprop=\"paymentAccepted\"  style='display: none' >cash, check, credit card, invoice<\/div>\n<p>\t<meta itemprop=\"openingHours\"  style='display: none'  datetime=\"Mo,Tu,We,Th,Fr 09:30-17:30\" \/><\/p>\n<div itemtype=\"http:\/\/schema.org\/GeoCoordinates\" itemscope=\"\" itemprop=\"geo\">\n\t\t<meta itemprop=\"latitude\" content=\"51.632223\" \/><br \/>\n\t\t<meta itemprop=\"longitude\" content=\"0.1781417\" \/>\n\t<\/div>\n<div itemtype=\"http:\/\/schema.org\/PostalAddress\" itemscope=\"\" itemprop=\"address\">\n<div itemprop=\"streetAddress\">1345 High Rd<\/div>\n<div><span itemprop=\"addressLocality\">London<\/span>, <span itemprop=\"addressRegion\">London<\/span> <span itemprop=\"postalCode\">N20 9HR<\/span><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p><\/center><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I seriously want to hug the woman who sent me the e-mail below! Like almost every newly separated person, she is fearful of the unknown, sad, in a way, and lonely. But, she ends her e-mail with, \u201cI am working on myself.&#8221; Wow. This is the best thing she can say and do right now. &hellip; <\/p>\n<p class=\"link-more\"><a href=\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/i-am-working-on-myself-the-best-thing-a-divorced-person-can-say\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;I Am Working On Myself: The Best Thing a Divorced Person Can Say!&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":201517,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-201516","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-news1","entry"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>I Am Working On Myself: The Best Thing a Divorced Person Can Say! - Dominic Levent Solicitors Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/i-am-working-on-myself-the-best-thing-a-divorced-person-can-say\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"I Am Working On Myself: The Best Thing a Divorced Person Can Say! - Dominic Levent Solicitors Blog\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I seriously want to hug the woman who sent me the e-mail below! Like almost every newly separated person, she is fearful of the unknown, sad, in a way, and lonely. But, she ends her e-mail with, \u201cI am working on myself.&#8221; Wow. This is the best thing she can say and do right now. &hellip; Continue reading &quot;I Am Working On Myself: The Best Thing a Divorced Person Can Say!&quot;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/i-am-working-on-myself-the-best-thing-a-divorced-person-can-say\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Dominic Levent Solicitors Blog\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2023-03-16T17:53:53+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/working-on-myself.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"600\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"401\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"spainops\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"spainops\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"4 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/i-am-working-on-myself-the-best-thing-a-divorced-person-can-say\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/i-am-working-on-myself-the-best-thing-a-divorced-person-can-say\/\",\"name\":\"I Am Working On Myself: The Best Thing a Divorced Person Can Say! - Dominic Levent Solicitors Blog\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/i-am-working-on-myself-the-best-thing-a-divorced-person-can-say\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/i-am-working-on-myself-the-best-thing-a-divorced-person-can-say\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/working-on-myself.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2023-03-16T17:53:53+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/bacc79b48921539cd8fc642f86d23254\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/i-am-working-on-myself-the-best-thing-a-divorced-person-can-say\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/i-am-working-on-myself-the-best-thing-a-divorced-person-can-say\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/working-on-myself.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/working-on-myself.jpg\",\"width\":600,\"height\":401},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/\",\"name\":\"Dominic Levent Solicitors Blog\",\"description\":\"\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/bacc79b48921539cd8fc642f86d23254\",\"name\":\"spainops\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/6a2648c0ace71d8dde31f2a9e8b370b694f81d70a3ed9ccfb9ec45550a223943?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/6a2648c0ace71d8dde31f2a9e8b370b694f81d70a3ed9ccfb9ec45550a223943?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"spainops\"},\"sameAs\":[\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\"],\"url\":\"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/author\/spainops\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"I Am Working On Myself: The Best Thing a Divorced Person Can Say! - Dominic Levent Solicitors Blog","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/i-am-working-on-myself-the-best-thing-a-divorced-person-can-say\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"I Am Working On Myself: The Best Thing a Divorced Person Can Say! - Dominic Levent Solicitors Blog","og_description":"I seriously want to hug the woman who sent me the e-mail below! 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