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Are you living together during divorce? This can be a tough situation. After all, you\u2019ve decided you want a divorce.<\/a> You want to be separate. But what happens when neither you or your spouse wants to or are able to actually move out? There are so many reasons a couple might remain living together during divorce.<\/p>\n There are few things more stressful than having to live with an openly hostile, hurt spouse while you are divorcing. Believe me, I know. The negative emotions in this arrangement can be very damaging to you and your children. In some cases, spouses spend excess time collecting what they believe to be evidence for the divorce proceedings. They might record you, intentionally misinterpret everything you say, and try to incite conflict with you and your children. This is both obnoxious and annoying. And really hard to live with.<\/p>\n I suggest you set up some ground rules that can help you and your spouse manage through the process in a more civilized and less toxic way:<\/p>\n Hopefully, you can find different spaces in the house to sleep<\/a>. Whether it\u2019s a guest bedroom, a basement or you turn the family room into a temporary bedroom, you need to have separate living space. Privacy is important. Having your own place to calm down when emotions flare up (and they will) is key. This allows you to grieve and to feel everything from anger to sadness to resentment and to fear. Having privacy also allows you to begin living your new separate life.<\/p>\n This is the beginning of setting boundaries \u2013 physical boundaries.<\/strong><\/p>\n If there are children, you will need to decide who is responsible for the children\u2019s daily routines, and set the schedule so that the children know who is responsible for what and on which days. It\u2019s important to have consistency for the kids. Do your best to make the schedule cooperative and collaborative.<\/p>\n Don\u2019t set your spouse up for mistakes by changing carpool schedules or holding onto necessary information or phone numbers. That\u2019s counter productive and only exacerbates the situation.\u00a0 Working out how you share parenting duties<\/a> benefits you and your kids. It requires clear communication and commitment to the children, as well as commitment to and acceptance of your future co-parenting relationship.<\/p>\n This is the beginning of setting parental boundaries.<\/strong><\/p>\n Oh yeah \u2013 and allocating parental responsibilities includes deciding who will be taking care of the dog and when! And be flexible \u2013 especially if you are both living in the house and sometimes one of you is away with the kids and the other is home with the dog. Be considerate. To each other and the dog.<\/p>\n <\/p>\nIf you are living together during divorce, how do you cope?<\/h2>\n
1. Define your own space, and establish boundaries:<\/strong><\/h2>\n
2. Allocate parenting responsibilities:<\/strong><\/h2>\n