{"id":239307,"date":"2024-09-13T14:06:01","date_gmt":"2024-09-13T14:06:01","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/?p=239307"},"modified":"2024-09-13T14:08:30","modified_gmt":"2024-09-13T14:08:30","slug":"my-ex-wont-talk-to-me-makes-co-parenting-pretty-darn-difficult","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dominiclevent.com\/blog\/my-ex-wont-talk-to-me-makes-co-parenting-pretty-darn-difficult\/","title":{"rendered":"\u201cMy Ex Won\u2019t Talk to Me\u201d Makes Co-parenting Pretty Darn Difficult!"},"content":{"rendered":"

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\u00a0<\/strong>\u201cMy Ex Won\u2019t talk to me.\u201d It\u2019s something we hear often from people in divorce and after. Communication breakdowns <\/a>in divorce are most often the result of two things: anger and resentment. \u00a0Anger and resentment can cause someone to shut down\u2014meaning just avoiding any communication with the ex, and even acting childish.<\/p>\n

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Not communicating with an ex <\/a>doesn\u2019t usually present issues if there are no children involved, but it becomes a big problem when parents are unable or unwilling to communicate with each other. In these situations, everyone\u2014mainly the children, suffer. \u00a0First and foremost, children feel the disconnect emotionally. Even kids who have happily married parents have a hard time when there is conflict between Mom and Dad. It\u2019s uncomfortable and stressful, and it causes them to feel insecure.<\/p>\n

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When one or both parents refuse to talk to the other, it can also affect a child in practical ways. Communication breakdowns can affect: kids\u2019 school attendance, after school activities, medication regimens, nutrition, homework assignments, playdates, and more. No communication means missed messages that ultimately hurt the kids.<\/p>\n

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What to do and what not to do for: \u201cMy Ex Won\u2019t Talk to Me\u201d<\/h2>\n

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Let\u2019s start with a couple things you shouldn\u2019t do if you find that your ex won\u2019t speak to you, and co-parenting seems almost impossible. First, don\u2019t use your child as a messenger to communicate with your ex.<\/p>\n

\u201cMom told me to tell you that you owe her money for child support,\u201d is not appropriate. Neither is: \u201cDad said he will pick me up from school on Friday.\u201d The kids should not be involved. It is simply too stressful for them, and it will affect them emotionally. <\/em><\/h2>\n

Next, kids are not the right people to vent to about your frustration. So, try to avoid saying, \u201cI don\u2019t know who is picking you up on Friday after school. Your dad won\u2019t talk to me.\u201d That will result in more stress and sadness for your child.<\/p>\n

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So, how do you communicate with your ex when your ex won\u2019t talk to you?<\/h2>\n

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Through non-verbal methods that can include: email, text messaging, and messaging on OurFamilyWizard. Non-verbal methods of conversing when dealing with regular communication breakdowns post divorce can be a smart way to find some sort of neutral, middle ground in dealing with your co-parent.\u00a0 Emailing or texting works to a point, in that you are able to express yourself in writing, yet it can become a liability when one parent claims your message was lost in cyberspace, deleted or was not sent to the right address.<\/p>\n

Using a communication tool specifically designed for situations such as this, like OurFamilyWizard Messages, is a way for both parents to ensure their communication is secure and documented in full.\u00a0 Parents have separate accounts which are linked together within a family in the app, so all of their communication is isolated to their family forum.\u00a0 Messages on OurFamilyWizard are sent between accounts, so parents know their messages are going to the correct recipient.\u00a0 This also separates emotionally charged conversations with your co-parent from your other, non-family related emails.<\/p>\n

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Even when you try and engage with your co-parent in the most polite manner you can manage, sometimes emotions may slip through your words, and you\u2019ll say something you maybe wish you did not.\u00a0 Similar to how spell checking works, OurFamilyWizard offers\u00a0ToneMeter<\/a>\u00a0as an \u201cemotional spell checking\u201d device to analyze messages you compose and indicate phrases that could be received in a negative or misconstrued way by the recipient.\u00a0 ToneMeter is an easy-to-use tool that will give your message a quick once over so you can better prevent any miscommunications.<\/p>\n

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In closing, communicating with an ex isn\u2019t easy, especially in a high-conflict divorce and when one parent won\u2019t engage in any communication. It can feel frustrating and infuriating and hopeless. But if you keep your eye on your objective\u2014the best interests of your children, and you realize that you can only control YOU and not your ex, you will find your frustration will fade a lot quicker, and you will be more at peace with the situation. Your kids will feel that, too. To learn more about what OurFamilyWizard can offer to make your divorce experience less stressful and more productive, visit OurFamilyWizard.com.<\/a><\/p>\n

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Nikol Sotos, Attorney, Legal Liaison, OurFamilyWizard<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

OurFamilyWizard<\/a> is the world\u2019s largest co-parenting platform with a mission to help families living separately thrive. OFW provides both families and the professionals who serve them with the tools necessary for more seamless and successful co-parenting.<\/p>\n

Over one million parents and professionals have used OurFamilyWizard to share calendars, messages, journals, files, expenses, and other important information regarding their minor children. Our platform is recommended by courts in all 50 states, Canada, the UK, New Zealand, and Australia.<\/p>\n

Like this article? Check out \u201cHow to Help a Child Deal With Divorce\u201d<\/a><\/h2>\n

The post \u201cMy Ex Won\u2019t Talk to Me\u201d Makes Co-parenting Pretty Darn Difficult!<\/a> appeared first on Divorce Blog | Divorce Support Blogs<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n

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